


Professional

by Writing-The-Ghostbusters (writingfanfic)



Category: Ghostbusters (Movies 1984-1989), Ghostbusters - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, One-Sided Attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-22
Updated: 2018-03-22
Packaged: 2019-04-06 15:10:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14059632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingfanfic/pseuds/Writing-The-Ghostbusters
Summary: For the prompt: 'Can I get the reader calling the ghostbusters with a ghost problem so they come over to her house to investigate and Venkman and Egon just flirt with the reader (maybe Egon a little more awkwardly lol) and frustrated Ray actually tries to do real work?'Sure can! My baby Egon.





	Professional

“I swear, I was just sitting on the sofa, and there it was.”

You stand in the living room, arms around yourself, and the man standing in front of you with the fluffy brown hair smiles as if he has been handed the keys to a new Beamer for Christmas.

“Well, ma’am, you are safe with us. You are very, very safe with us. Is that… nylon?” he asks, and you look down. You’re in a floaty chiffon shirt, and it’s a little more see-through than you’d like - you pull it around yourself, and smile tightly.

“Doctor Venkman, would you care to look around?” you say, and he nods.

“Dr. Stantz, you find anything yet?”

The guy in your living room, who is smoking - you’re not very happy about that, but you figure they’re the experts - turns around, and folds his arms.

“Peter, it’d go quicker with you helping…”

“See? Ray’s got it. So… is it… just you here?” he asks, and you look over at Ray, who shrugs helplessly, and you can’t help but smile. “No boyfriend… girlfriend…” You shake your head, and he nods. “Well, ma’am, I am Doctor Peter Venkman, and I will be your _personal_ Ghostbuster for this evening…”

“Venkman, I’ve talked to Zeddemore.” You look around. You’ve seen them on television… which one is he, with the glasses? Egon something? “He’s doing some research on the architectural history of the building… is this the client?” You nod, and the man speaking extends his hand. “Doctor Egon Spengler. May I scan you?”

“…you haven’t even bought me a drink,” you say, completely unable to think of anything else, and he looks at Venkman, a wry smile touching his face.

“Oh, you two should get along,” he says, deadpan. “Anyway, ma’am, I just have to perform a physical check-up. Unlike Dr. Venkman, I won’t insist you remove your shirt…”

“That was one time, Egon, and _shut up_ …” Venkman says, and Ray clears his throat.

“ _Peter, a hand, over here, if you don’t mind_ ,” he says, firmly, and Venkman rolls his eyes.

“I will be back in just a minute,” he says, and Egon rolls his eyes.

“Can we… go into the kitchen, maybe?” you ask, and he nods.

“Naturally. Has anything paranormal ever happened in the kitchen?” he asks, and you shake your head. “Food returning to its pre-processed state, becoming off or rotten overly quickly, attempting to devour you?” You shake your head, and lead him to the kitchen. “It should be fine.” He pulls out a weird hand-held thing that buzzes with little arms on the side, and scans the room. “Acceptable. A little below average, actually.”

“So… what kind of an examination are you going to perform?” you ask slowly, and Egon scans you up and down.

“The kind that makes Venkman stop hitting on you…” he says, slowly, and notes something down. “And also I have to ensure that you haven’t been possessed, or are on the way to being possessed. Sometimes when a ghost is disturbed, it will attempt to possess the human owner of the dwelling it’s tethered to.” You stare at him. “It’s looking like that isn’t the case. Say ‘ah’.” You open your mouth, and he shines a torch in. “It’s quite frightening to do that and see someone looking back.” You close your mouth quickly, and he makes a note. “You have very nice teeth.”

“Th-thank you?” you try, and he smiles at you.

“Pay no attention to Venkman. He’s a prime example of a non-consensual-polyamorous partner.” You figure that one out, and smile. “Name?”

“(Y/N),” you say, and he proceeds to reel of the usual - D.O.B., age, etc. He then proceeds to scan you again - he seems satisfied with the results, whatever they mean, and then he looks you up and down.

“Do you know chiffon was originally made from silk threads until roughly 1938 when nylon took over?” You look down at your shirt, and shake your head.

“Boy, I am going to get dressed next time I see a ghost,” you say, and he nods.

“You’re a classic example of the endomorphic body shape. I doubt you’ll get many complaints, especially in New York.” You tilt your head, and he smiles at you again. “Statistically 10% of adults in America are vegetarian, and in New York, you’re never more than a block away from a vegetarian restaurant.” You nod again, not entirely sure where this is going, and then twig.

“Subtle, Dr. Spengler, much more subtle than Dr. Venkman, but-”

“ _Is she still here?_ ” Venkman bursts into the kitchen, and smiles when he sees you there. “Hello, ma’am. I hope Egon hasn’t bored you to death by telling you about the exact mix of materials in the cement of the building…”

“Oh, Dr. Venkman, I’d have to be an amateur to think death would stop you,” you smile, and Ray cracks up silently behind him. “What’s wrong with my living room?”

“Good news! It’s a free-roaming level four vaporous apparition, Spengs,” Ray says, excitedly, and you raise your eyebrow. “Basically, miss, it’s not tethered to your apartment or to you! Or any of your possessions.” You assume that’s a good thing.

“So what. We gotta chase this glowing goof around town now?!” Venkman asks, and then shakes his head. “A heroic sacrifice… Ray, you and Egon better go. You’re better at this than me.” Ray opens his mouth. “No! No, I won’t hear you deny it, as much as I know you really want to.”

You catch Egon’s eye, and fold your arms. His smile is barely visible, but it’s there.

“I’ll just… stay here. Hold the fort, if you will, with Miss (Y/N).”

“I could stay. I have a few further tests to run.” Egon looks at you - out of the two of them, you think he’s way less likely to press his suit, but you would still rather get to know them. Both of them.

“I pick Ray. Bye though,” you smile, and Ray pats your back as Egon and Venkman swap glances and trudge, defeatedly, out of the apartment. The door is barely closed before you hear them bickering outside, and you look at Ray.

“Wow.” He nods.

“If it helps, Venkman is always like that. Egon, though… that’s interesting. You don’t happen to collect moulds, spores and fungus, do you?” You shake your head slowly. “Did you set off the meter?” You shake your head again. “…wow.” He shrugs. “Well… don’t worry, I’m a professional.”

“It’s behind you,” you lie, and he spins around. “…professional.”

“…okay. But you know what I mean.”


End file.
